Five Hundred Twenty-five Thousand Six Hundred Minutes

My precious, sweet Adelaide, As you sleep peacefully in the other room, I can't push aside this nagging in my heart to write to you. Lately I have come face to face with the realization that you won't always be a little baby. Someday you will grow up and have sleepovers. You will get bigger and do algebra. You'll grow in stature, yes, but also in hurts, in failures, in loves, in successes, in years, (in miles in laughter in strife, in...) I won't always get to swing you up in my arms or give you raspberries on your belly or chase you through the living room. Every day is testimony to this one bittersweet fact: each day you are a day older. A day closer to being an independent young woman. Most of the time, it feels like forever away. But God has been quietly, intensely reminding me that one day, you'll be gone. I and your daddy have been entrusted with your life for a very brief period of time. And baby girl, I can't express to you how badly I don't want to miss out on that time. I don't want to ever look back on any moment of your life with regret. Too many things demand my attention, shout to me that they are more important. But sweet baby, at the end of the day NONE OF IT MATTERS. I'm not gonna care that the dishes were washed when I'm watching you walk out the door on your last day of high school. I'm not going to care that my facebook was updated as you put the finishing touches on your prom outfit. I'm not going to care that the floors were vaccuumed as you walk down the aisle on your last day as a (in name) Banfield. Those things will be of NO significance. So here I am this evening, promising you that I will begin praying now for a new agenda - new priorities in life. I want to be a Godly role model to you. I want you to know that I struggle each day, but that God is sovereign in my life and in my heart. I want you to believe that you can tell me anything, and that at the end of the day, NO MATTER WHAT, I will keep on loving you. In 10 minutes, when you're leaving me to go to college (at least I'm sure that's how fast it will feel)I hope we share a hug that is full of memories, of knowing that we took full advantage of our time spent together. I look forward to sharing tears, laughs, hurts, frustrations, joys, and everything in between with you. Even now, as your precious little sighs of pleasant dreams fill the air between us, I want to wrap you up and force you to stay little. But I can't do that. No matter what happens between now and then, I will seek to live in the moment, to love you as best I can through Christ, while at the same time, allowing you to grow and mature in your role as His precious and wise Princess. As God has been working in my heart and constantly reminding me: He takes care of the lilies of the fields and the birds of the air. I do not need to worry about tomorrow, about whether or not I will have "succeeded" as your mother. We may have a thousand tomorrows, or we may not have anymore tomorrows. Either way, God is enough, and He will work all things together for our good. I love you little bugaboo. You are going to change the world with your sweet spirit and tender love for others. I have no doubts- my God will be your God. Trust Him with your heart and let him lead you on an eternal journey, one full of adventure and joy and fullness. And all the while, Daddy and I will be on the sideline, praying for you, rooting for you, and soaking up every moment that God keeps our journeys as one. Sleep for now, for when you wake, I know you will move mountains. With an everlasting love, your mama